Since the drive was a little harder than I had anticipated on account of all the white stuff, we stayed overnight in a motel in a place called Dansville. The diner advertised all you can eat crab legs, but I went for a ten dollar steak instead. I ordered it still mooing for its mother, and it was perfect, I almost cried - ten bucks for a juicy steak in a crab scented diner - heaven.
So, we arrived a bit later than I had thought we would, but in plenty of time to go out and get smashed. The bar had a band that actually was pretty good, despite the bald guitarist adopting a hardcore gun slinging stance that better suited Jimmy page. The waitress told me 'I love your voice!' and i said 'You haven't heard me sing.'
Sunday we slept til midday, recovering, and then we popped down to the mall. In keeping with my NY experience, nowhere had any snow boots that fit me, so I continued to slip n slide through the snow in my street shoes. I hadn't been to that mall in six years, and it still smelled the exact same. Weird.
I have never seen such commitment to this sport! They drive out here, in the middle of woop woop and train in sweaters and all! I have never trained in thermals before. I'm not sure I even sweated, and they worked me hard! I had to have my puffer like three times, cos the air was so cold! And the floor! So slippery! These girls are amazing skaters, they've adapted to their conditions and still shredded. Unsurprisingly, they were all super nice and I laughed my ass off the whole time. Notice the slim nature of the barn? If you hit someone to the outside, they smash into the wall! It was awesome! Anya Face was running the training - she's amazing. She joined in a hitting drill later on and I just could not evade her, her timing is wicked! Sufferjet (who organised our visit) was kicking ass too, so speedy - actually all of them were whipping around, my quads were screaming. There's a chick called Slacker as well - holy snowballs can she hit! Explosion after explosion accompanied with maniacal laughter had me alternating between fear and extreme derby crush. They taught me some new tricks that I'll be bringing home and also left me with a nice bruise - this is courtesy of a small firecracker speedster called Mirambo, with whom I swapped my sweater - the bottom pic shows how ADRD is represented in Canada now! I didn't get to know all the girls' names, but I can say that I was instantly spewing that I couldn't hang with them more. They would all slot right in to ADRD like a finger in a bum.
IT COSTS $20 FOR A 3D MOVIE IN AUSTRALIA! AND THEY DON'T CARE WHAT DAY IT IS!!
Look at the drink we got. No supersize, just a regular large. Note the size compared to Kitty's head.Ok, that's almost long enough. I have to split the Canada trip into two, cos we still have fireworks, pond hockey and tobogganing to go, but I just wanna talk about Bren to finish up.
I met Brenda when I came here in 2004. We instantly got along so well cos she's so amicable and funny to boot. I didn't know the half of it until we started to hang out more. This is the deal with Bren: she is perhaps the coolest person on earth. Cooler than me, and that's hard to top, let's face reality here. I have never in my life met anyone like her. She loves her kids more that life itself. I'm serious, I'd rather sneak up and steal a cub from a Tigress than fuck with Bren, she will flat out deck you, she actually once beat a guy to a pulp for acting very inappropriately towards her daughter Hannah. Also, nobody knows anyone stronger than this woman. There's been times when she's been exceedingly unwell (it's not my prerogative to divulge details, but I mean scary unwell) and she doesn't miss a stride. She's been a missionary, delivered babies that would have died without her presence and she volunteers for the homeless in soup kitchens every week. She also can down a hell of a lot of beer and plays hockey like a champ. You wish you knew this person. yeah, she's ok. Her kids are both normal in the sense that teenagers do teenage shit, which is cool, but they also both have a very grounded sense of themselves in the scheme of things and they take their education very seriously. They also both are somehow able to excel at absolutely any sport they try. Bastards. Also, Bren's parents live with her now too, which is awesome because they are so super cute and her Dad says 'eh' all the time.
Ok! That really is enough. I need to go and throw a snowball at Kitty's crotch.